Recalled reading CNN news few days back and came across with this hate letter (http://edition.cnn.com/2013/08/19/world/canada-autistic-letter) targeted at a 13-year-old boy with Autism.
My guess is, the content would probably render horrified faces from individuals with knowledge in ASD, coz I did. While trying to understand the sender of hate letter, analyzing mode triggered.
What would have cause/ the last straw for the sender to painstakingly craft the letter, print it, *probably drive/any mode of transport to the receiver's grandmother's house, put it in the mail box- with the probable risk that someone might notice?
Yes. Painstakingly.
Occasionally we would do things just on the spur of the moment, an impulse.
But curiosity really overflows on this One issue: How can one, considering the time and effort taken to:
(i) switch on laptop/ smart-phone/ ipad, tab- compose the emotion-laden letter (*might require some effort to spell the word that best describes the emotion; also take note effort is needed if finger accidentally presses the nearby alphabet instead of the intended ones-->delete; occasionally receiving notifications from social networks, whatsapp, line, twitter-->distractor and requires effort to click them off)
(ii) print it out- maybe take a final angry glance at it to ensure all the angry words are in place
(iii) grab the car key furiously- walk to the house door, opens it furiously- make way to the car
(iv) 15-minute drive- drive all the way to receiver's grandmother's house
(v) *maybe* enter the letter into the mail box
#Point being, after doing ALL of the above (may miss one, two, or there is more), the profound emotion that propelled the sender in the first place to have such thought, was still there.
And it persisted all the way, until the message is really being conveyed, with the risk of eye-witness, and also potential road-rage behaviors.
Hence the curiosity on the final straw.
I am really sorry for whichever the final straw was. From the letter, I am guessing it could be the scream might have caused unpleasant episode between family members. Or the experience that special population has received differential treatment (in favorable manner) in work place. Or the stress hormones that infiltrate every cell in body that render the black-hole like emotion: destroying every pleasant feeling, leaving one grapples for what can be caught, and reached.
But I feel more sorry for Karla Begley, the 13-year-old boy, Max's mother.
Yes. Everyone will have a lot to deal on their plate, and it is not that everything on the plate is palatable.
And Karla, she has more.
But instead of complaining, mourning, or brooding like little kids when vegetables are being placed in their plates, she opted for making herself and her family Michelin 5 star dish; a meteorologist who observes and believes every cloud has a silver lining; bless in disguise.
Karla has Multiple Sclerosis. For more info: (http://www.nationalmssociety.org/about-multiple-sclerosis/what-we-know-about-ms/what-is-ms/index.aspx)
Having the disease of immune system, she is a loving mother, resilient, strong, positive, observant, sharp, grateful.
# Point being= No matter what WE have in our cells, in our brain, in our mind, we are still capable of love.
No doubt a very good writer can construct well-enumerated and elaborated profiles on "what love is", but I believe, that without practicality, without the experience to give out and receive love, all great words are but futile, meaningless, empty vessels--sound is there, but no melody.
A Look into Karla's response to the hate letter:
*For full reading*
*Quotes of the Day*
"I will not stoop to an insulting level" ---> EQ trainers could actually consider this as an inspiring nugget~
"Those 'noises' are the only way my son has to express himself and play"
"I'd rather people bring things out in the open..I'd rather kids ask than grow up to be the sort of people who write nasty letters about autism"
MY FAVOURITE <3 <3 <3 (cited from "Love that Max: Special Needs Blog")
"Even if Max doesn't speak like the rest of us do, he understands. He reads my face, too. If I'm not all happy, he comes up to me and says 'Mommy cry?' and if I am crying he'll wipe my eyes and give me a hug. He may not do things other kids do, he may not be on a sports team, but he has a zest for life—he loves to look around, listen to music, go snowmobiling and jet-skiing with his father."
"Everyone who knows Max loves him. He is a blessing. I think I'm lucky: How many mothers still have their 13-year-old son wanting to sit on the couch, have mommy time and cuddles, and not be afraid to show love and affection?"
It is like, the words suddenly grow hands. Warmly, and gently, reaches to your heart, rocking it, singing a lullaby.
That's what I meant- That only a person who lives with love (instead of spelling love) is capable of writing, because love is not something far-fetched, abstract; but something that lives side-by-side, the one thing you see when open your eyes in the morning.
Wish to say, really really strong support, and sincere gratitude to Karla as she spoke not only to the hate letter's sender, but to the rest of the world, family members of children with ASD or other DSM-V diagnoses. You've made a strong presence, and I felt your love so much. It is amazing, and you are amazing :) You said Max is a blessing. I think you are a blessing too, for your dear family, for me, for the rest of the world.
Last note~ For me, a sweet person is not the one who climbs all sorts of ladder to pluck something; But the one who is willing to step forward, and reach for your heart, with the person's heart, and love.
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